Rabbi Ross. As my children are getting older, they’re beginning to read and hear things that my wife and I don’t agree with. This past week, my 15 year-old-son Yoni, decided he doesn’t want to wear a mask into stores anymore. He was convinced by some arguments he read from a Jewish person in a Jewish newspaper. He’s a good boy, and will listen if I tell him to anyways, but I think this deserves an explanation. How can I convince him it’s the right thing to do – he’s not a dumb kid and won’t fall for any tricks. TIA - Eli.
I would like to begin by pointing out that most kids don’t fall for “tricks”. Parents like to think that they’re fooling their kids at times. Here’s some great advice. Children are a lot smarter than we give them credit for. To answer your question, I would suggest telling your son the following, or better yet, let him read it himself. The way I like to explain things to my own children is as follows. There are three main types of conspiracy theorists. The first type is the relatively harmless type. An example would be, the people that believe the earth is flat. I have a friend (we’ll call him Joe) who is completely convinced that the world is flat. He asked me to check out his website, and he is 100% convinced. He can actually prove it, (although his proofs are fallacies). Joe likes to share his view with anyone who can listen, but he’s a pretty chilled out guy. Joe doesn’t hurt anyone and splits his time between telling people about the earth being flat, and the fact that he’s a vegan. Joe’s views aren’t dangerous, although he does run the risk of boring people to death. The second type of conspiracy theorists are those that mainly harm themselves. An example would be those that are anti vaccines. I’ve spoken with many of these people, and we’ve come to an agreement of sorts. We all agree that putting chemicals into your body isn’t a smart thing to do. However, I go a step further and say the benefits of putting these chemicals into your body completely outweighs the minuscule (but possible) chance of having a serious or deadly reaction. The ones that get harmed the most are the immediate family members who are unprotected from the deadly diseases that we’re taking the vaccine for. Nonetheless, there are some immune compromised people that are unable to take vaccines. These people are in danger because of these anti-vaccination theories. If a person that doesn’t get vaccinated is sick with any transmittable disease, and they come in contact with one of these compromised people, it can have a horrible consequence. I’ve tried explaining this to many of these people, but they are guilty of the very same things they accuse everyone else of. Namely, they refuse to listen to anyone who doesn’t agree with them. They risk hurting others, but mostly they’re hurting themselves. I know the names of many people associated with this “movement”, and at least for some I do not impugn their motives, but my wish is that they at least agree to take the vaccines that can kill other people if there is no herd immunity. The last group of conspiracy theorists are the deadliest. They are the people that will actively hurt others to prove a point. Here’s an example. People that refuse to wear a mask indoors (in a public place). To be fair, medical experts do not completely understand this pandemic, but all of the top experts in the field, such as the CDC, the NIAID, the IDSA and the state DOH (the alphabet soup of infection professionals) all strongly advocate that wearing masks will save countless lives. I’m sure many of us have had doubts if this virus was dealt with correctly. There is a lot of false information being passed around, and it gets very confusing. To be brutally honest, I’ve wondered why I need to wear a mask if I’m Davening outdoors. However, and this part is critical, my doubts are unimportant! I’m not a doctor! Yes, Facebook and Google have ordained me at times, but there are people way smarter than me that are telling us that wearing a mask is mandatory. I asked my doctor and my Rav. They both said to wear a mask. It’s that simple. I’m not a “sheep” nor do I follow blindly. I just believe that if there’s even a one in a million chance that I could prevent someone from getting sick by wearing a mask, I’ll do it! Even though the masks make my work more difficult, they’re irritating, and they are seriously uncomfortable, I’ll still wear them. The ones that argue about this are plain old self-centered people. If it’s that hard to walk around inside a store with a mask, stay home! Some of these people have written the most eloquent and detailed arguments against masks. I’ve read them, and here’s the gist of what they’re writing. “I’m a selfish person and I’ll risk the lives of others so I can get some attention.” At least with people that are against vaccinations, I understand their fears. They don’t want to inject chemicals in their body. The fact that these chemicals can save their lives ( as well as others), is what they’re arguing about. Don’t get me wrong, I think they’re terribly mistaken. However, I can understand from their “viewpoint” why they think they shouldn’t vaccinate. I can’t understand the argument regarding wearing a mask. Is it uncomfortable to that extent? When a 45-year-old father is barely breathing while on a respirator because some selfish person decided her mask was a hassle and coughed near him, something is wrong. Here’s the reply she’ll give. “If masks are so helpful, his mask should have protected him!” Well here’s the deal. Masks aren’t that helpful. Therefore, if both parties are wearing one, it’s much safer for everyone. Throughout our history, there have been groups of Jews that fought against the Rabbanim and everyone else because they felt that “they knew better”. Each time the consequences were horrible, and yet history keeps repeating itself. These people delude themselves into believing that they are acting properly and “L’shaim Shamayim. Unfortunately, all that they’re doing is misleading others and causing harm to other Jews. In any case Yoni, here are the facts. There are people that don’t wear masks. They’ll openly brag about it as if they’re doing the public a favor. They’ll write about it, post it online, and tell anyone who’ll listen. They’ll give reasons ranging from health to religion. Ultimately, they’re telling you as I wrote earlier, “I’m a selfish person, and I’ll risk the lives of innocent people so I can get some desperately needed attention.” I can’t tell you that wearing a mask will save you or anyone else. Nevertheless, if there’s a .01% chance that my mask will save someone else, I’ll wear one. I’m sure you will also. Have a good Shabbos, YR
19 Comments
Dovid W.
8/14/2020 08:28:30 am
You missed my favorite conspiracy, birds aren't real! This was a wonderful response, and I'm sure that it will be noticed.
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Baila Oferman
8/14/2020 10:22:49 am
Rabbi Ross. I usually agree with your emails, but this article reeks of payoffs. Did you get money to write this from somewhere? How could you really believe that masks aren't dangerous? I'm so thankful for the wonderful advice you give, but maybe stick to advice and not moral lessons that are incorrect.
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Shira M
8/14/2020 10:46:48 am
Can you provide factual information that says he’s incorrect?
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Baila Oferman
8/14/2020 10:53:54 am
I don't need to! If people want us to wear masks, they have to prove their worth. According to what Rabbi Ross wrote, I'm a selfish person because I advise people not to asphyxiate themselves for no reason.
Steven W
8/14/2020 11:28:58 am
Are you seriously questioning the Rabbi's intelligence and integrity?
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Cindy A
8/14/2020 12:46:52 pm
If you disagree with Rabbi Ross that's one thing, but Payoffs?? Seriously? from who??? your comment makes you seem like ridiculous conspiracy theorist. And as an aside, most of Rabbi Ross's advice is moral lessons!
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Anonymous
8/14/2020 12:49:48 pm
I’m not comfortable writing my name, but I have it in very good authority from big doctors and Rabbis that masks cause breathing problems. We need to be level headed.
Ariel Lesser
8/14/2020 01:18:33 pm
Well Mr. Anonymous, there’s a very famous rule. No name, no credibility. You’re anonymous, the rabbis are anonymous and the doctors are anonymous. Stinks of conspiracy.
Anonymous
8/14/2020 04:18:58 pm
OMG! Anonymous people have no credibility??? Ever??? Where do you get that idea?? I just posted this anonymously. Is this incredible, too?
Shira M
8/14/2020 03:06:44 pm
A. You don’t have to but you probably should of You’re going to make outlandish decelerations about how dangerous masks are
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Matta
8/14/2020 12:59:54 pm
Well said and appreciated! Sorry you had a troll on your thread, i guess he didn't read the entire blog?
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Asher Adelman
8/14/2020 01:36:50 pm
Thank you for being outspoken. I don’t understand why this is so difficult. Actually I do. Social Media. People believe the lies that they read, and it’s corrupting society. Please wear masks everywhere. You could save a life.
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Anonymous
8/14/2020 04:16:10 pm
You're trying to stuff to divergent ideas into your response. Leave the medical info out of this, Rabbi Ross. You're no doctor. It's irrelevant whether your right or wrong medically, in this answer.
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Anonymous
8/14/2020 04:39:17 pm
Actually, I want to apologize. What I meant to say, is that Rabbi Ross is right, and we should listen to him. Please forgive me.
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Rivka Rosenbaum
8/14/2020 05:11:46 pm
I can’t stop laughing. For anyone who missed it, Mr. Anonymous was saying “what’s wrong with being anonymous?” Then he apologized. Not really, someone pretended to be him, thus proving that being anonymous is really useless since we can’t tell who’s talking. I love it!! Mr. Anonymous, thanks for your apology. Accepted! Ha!
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Nigel Collins
8/16/2020 01:09:38 pm
What would you say if a person has had Covid 19 and has been tested and has antibodies. Is there a need to still wear a mask?
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Elisheva Stern
8/16/2020 03:45:37 pm
Hi. I'm a nurse, and I can assure you we've had cases of people that had antibodies that became ill again with Covid. So much of this virus isn't understood yet - let's just wear the mask.
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Private
8/16/2020 03:48:14 pm
I'll be very straight with you. I hated your vaccination article, and I'm very opposed to vaccinations. I loved what you wrote though - you understand us but don't agree. That's a breath of fresh air. I also agree that wearing a masks isn't such a big deal and even though I think it's useless I wear one also. Just in case.
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Retired Parent
8/18/2020 11:31:18 am
There is no doubt that wearing a mask will help reduce transmission and receiving virus of Covid 19. Will the standard masks prevent almost all infections, of course not, but they will reduce community infection. No excuse not to wear mask. Sadly it appears in our community there is much more resistance to wearing masks than in the general population. Why that is so, if true is a real problem to be discussed
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AuthorRabbi Yitzie Ross is a Rebbe and has been working with parents and kids for many years. You can read more about him in the "about" section. Archives
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