Which Track Part II

Dear Readers. Last week, we discussed how to decide which track your kids should be placed into in Yeshiva. This week, we’re going to IY”H focus on ways to motivate your children to learn better. This pertains to both Hebrew and English subjects.

Let me begin by being very clear about something. It’s the job of the Rebbe/teacher to motivate your child. The fact that we’re discussing pointers in no way should change that detail. If you feel that your child is not being motivated properly or has no desire to succeed, you need to have a serious discussion with the Rebbe or teacher in question. 

Nonetheless, as parents, we understand that there are times that our children might occasionally need a bit of a jumpstart. Below are a few ideas that you can try - understanding of course, that some approaches may work better than others.

1. Offering a reward for a specific day, (“Learn well today and I’ll treat you to ice cream”), is not a good idea. It leads to a constant need to make promises and offer rewards.
2. A great idea is to use a chart. This only works well if you take it seriously; if you miss days it becomes a joke.  The chart should be visible, perhaps near the area where your child does homework or stores their school bags.
3. Incentives are also great. The key difference between incentives and charts, is as follows:
   1. Charts require more work on your part but offer your child a visual reminder. This reminder helps them stay on track as well as helps them stay focused on the task at hand.
   2. Incentives require less work. (“If you learn well this entire week, and your teacher confirms, we are going to get ice cream!”). However, if your child is not highly motivated, it can fizzle out after a day.
4. As we discussed in a previous article, homework is one of the hardest battles during the school year. If you can figure out a time and location that makes your child more tolerant of it, he might be less resistant. Click here for the homework article.
5. It’s also very important to acknowledge your child’s frustrations and difficulties.  It really helps them get through Yeshiva if you empathize with them when they’re having a frustrating day.
6.  There is no shame in sharing your stories from when you were little. Let them understand that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.
7. Missing a day of Yeshiva or school is a special treat that should be reserved for one-on-one mommy or daddy time. Once you start giving your kids a day off just because they’re overwhelmed, it’ll never end.
8. If your child needs more serious motivation, it might be a good idea to get in touch with the Rebbe or teacher and see if you can work out a plan together.  As professionals, they are trained to work with you and your child.

Wishing you continued Nachas from all of your your children.

YR